A Jazzy Night Out
In between our busy corporate lives, the office peeps sometimes meets up and unwinds over drinks and music. We went thru a patch of hitting jazz shows/bars which was eye-opening indeed for a hard-rocker like me used to thumping drumbeats and heart-wrenching melodic guitar riffs....
The following conversation occurred between the hours of 2:00-3:00 AM after a regular jazz bar session.
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On Fantasy Love Connection
Ed: So tell me....do you ever fantasize about how you'd like to meet that special someone... you know, how you'd ideally want to meet your soulmate?
Terry: Why don't you start first?
Me: *Does a The Rock impression with the eyebrows & puffs on cigarrette in silence*
Ed: My fantasy is to fall in love with a childhood friend who I’ve known all my life and grew up all these years together being JUST close friends until that one moment when I realise that I like him more than just a friend.
Me: That sucks. I mean WTF is wrong with that guy that in all those years that u guys have been friends yet he hasn’t been able to spark any attraction in you at all ?? What a fcuking wuss !
Terry: Now, now NiK....I think its cute.
Me: Well u’d think that dude cos ur a NICE guy.
Terry: What’s wrong with being NICE ??! *raises tone of voice*
Ed: Yeah...don't listen to him Terence...you are a nice guy and sweet.
Terry: Don’t call me SWEET..anything but SWEET !!!
Me: Women always say they want a nice, caring, guy who’ll take care of their every needs and cater to them 24-7 but that’s bollocks ! Pure and utter bollocks.
Take it from a NICE guy that’s been doing that for the past 24 yrs man. What women actually want is a CHALLENGE. And being NICE 24-7 is NOT a challenge to women at all. Once they see u as a pushover then the attraction stops there and then.
U have to keep things unpredictable. The moment the woman realises that she can never figure out what is going to happen next whenever she’s with you....that’s when u’ve got her hook, line and sinker.
THEN...only can you be NICE...even then, only once in awhile (!). Ration ur niceness and she’ll come to appreciate u more.
Ed: Ur so full of sh1t NiK.
Terry: yeah...I still think being NICE is the way to go about charming women.
Me: U do that son....just don't come crying to me when ur still a 40-yr old virgin...
Ed: So what’s YOUR fantasy then Mr. Wise Guy?
Me: Why...everything a Man would dream of, of course..... a pneumatic bimbo blonde with the body of a goddess and the brains of Einstein...plus the cooking skillz of a Cordon Bleu chef.
Terry: Ladies and gentleman...we have just left Planet Earth and am now approaching orbit of Fantasy World.
Ed: T’ch!!! ya’haa....Nik there’s no women like that which exists in the world !
Me: I can dream can’t I ?? *winks naughtily*
Seriously tho’....my fantasy would be to meet a woman...and on first impressions...there’s nothing there.... but as I gradually get to know that woman as a person..all her little little idiosyncrasies... she turns out to be more interesting than I initially thought...and eventually I realise that SHE’S the ONE all along.
Terry: Dude...how is that different from Adrinna’s fantasy?
Me: That’s why ur a NICE guy...subtle stuff like this just goes over ur head doesn’t it dear?
Ed: Now..now...no need to be so harsh on Terence. And that’s not much of a fantasy is it Nik...
Me: I guess I’m just not as *creative* as u then....
Ed: Heh heh...yeah I kinda made up my fantasy as the conversation went along....
Me: I could tell...it was regular rom-com storyline neways.... Brat!
On Relationships
Ed : I’d prefer a SWEET relationship any day of the week over a ROMANTIC relationship.
Terry: What’s the difference b/w those two ?
Ed: Well....I don’t want to be romanced all the time y’know...it’s kinda stifling and the effect wears off after awhile. In a sweet relationship tho’, the guy does these sweet caring stuff once in a blue moon unexpectedly which is way, way more powerful than getting romanced with chocs, flowers and gifts 24-7. It’s not the gift that’s important, but how you do it and the thought that counts.
Terry: What does Mr. 'Machoman' over here think about that comment.
Me: It’s fairly valid comment, altho’ explained in a woman’s regular convoluted way (i.e. talking about feelings instead of thinking about it scientifically).
It’s a logical Law of Human Nature-lah.
Once u GET something, then the attraction isn’t there anymore. It’s not fun anymore once u actually get what u have been chasing for all along. So it’s actually harder to keep a relationship alive than to start one because you have to maintain that attraction.
How do you do that ? By not stifling the woman and giving her *The Gift of Missing You*.
By not doing things just because she asks you to (obligation) but because you want to.For example buy her flowers / cards/ gifts during valentines / birthday /etc. You shouldn’t feel obligated... heck, miss a few annivessaries sometimes... ur a man...it's expected of you !
Once she realises there's NO rhyme nor reason or pattern to your behaviour/gift-giving, she'll be CONSTANTLY on the look out for clues as to WHEN you will spring your NEXT surprise. And a woman which constantly THINKS of you, is a smitten woman who WON'T be looking/thinking a lot about other prospects now would she? ('cos 'naturally' ur a wholesome fella good enough for her tastes, for you to be constantly on her mind)
I know its kinda vague but as Ed said, it’s HOW you convey the gift...what context was it given ..cos she nagged u to get her some or cos u’ve planned it secretly and surprised her with one out of the blue ?
Ed: Scientifically ?? You are SUCH a NON-romantic aren't you....
Me: Aren't all MEN like that? *winks*
Terry: All this talking's making me sleepy...I'm heading off..gotta come early into the office tmw.
Conversation ends with three corporate peeps driving off into the midnight/early morn to their respective beds, safe in the thought that tomorrow is another boring day in the corporate machine known as WORK-LIFE.
posted by NiK! at
10:02 PM
