Sexualogy

The following blog posts represents a "phase" I was going thru at the ripe wee age of 24-26. Reading em again made me realise how gung-ho and all, I was about the subject then.

I learnt alot. Moved on with me life. And still *gaming* from time to time with me mates....and far, far happier with all the experiences and friends I have attained since then.

Enjoy....

• The Penis Dialogues


• The Modern Man/Woman Relationship Matrix


• My Top 5 Fav Rom-Coms


• The Ultimate Mistake Men Make With Women


• Why Do Women TEST Men?


• The WUSSY Defined


• Much Better Than Buying Her Dinner


• K.L. Clubbin Legend: Endie Shazlie


• What Reality TV Shows Can Teach You About Attracting Women


• The 7 Dont's of Dumping Him/Her


• The Key to Writing Rom-Coms


• How To Act When A Woman Likes You


• Attraction Isn't A Choice


• Why Are Most Men Losers in Love?


• Hitch-Can Will Smith Teach You To Be a Master Dater?


• Why Are Beautiful Women Different?


• What Can You Learn from the "40-Year Old Virgin"?


• Midnight Conversations


• On Being a MAN who 'Naturally' Attracts Women


• On Charisma: The Natural Aphrodisiac


• More Penis Dialogues


• The Mathematics of Love


• When Mr. Right turns out Wrong


• Where to Pick Up Women


• How To Be Popular In Life


• King Kong's 6 Mating Tips


• Last Night


• What Most Single Men Want


• Five Biggest Mistake Men Make


• The Secret to Picking Up Women


• F-R-E-E-Z-E!

My Guilty Pleasure

Heyheyhey!
Hey ppl,

Once a week, I'll write a column about my current guilty pleasure that I know logically I shouldn't enjoy, but inexplicably and unfortunately have fallen head over heels in love with, and am an avid devotee of said Pleasure.

So for this week, my guilty pleasure is : The OC

For the uninitiated (i.e. people that have a life and have something better to do on a Sunday night than sitting in front of the idiot box), The OC stands for Orange County and is a teen melodrama series shown on 8TV every Sunday night at 10:45 pm.

It's this millenium's answer to teen melodrama's of yore such as Beveryly Hills 90210 and Dawson's Creek (shit I feel SO old quoting these two shows....does any of the young readers even know wtf is BH90210 ? ;-p )

Initially, I disliked the show and just stopped seeing it after the pilot episode because it had the same old, same old characters that u can expect in any teen drama i.e.:....

The dumb popular jock (Luke), his trophy girlfriend (Marissa), the nerd/geek (Seth), the popular girl in school (Summer) and the rebel (Ryan).

Well, color me confused when I 'accidentally' saw an episode a few months later and the show has done a complete 180 degress turn. The writer have cleverly started with all the usual teen stereotypes then gradually thru the first season 'deconstructed' all these stereotypes and made each character human.

After all, that's what good storytelling is all about, showing ur characters grow and mature as they overcome adversity and challenges in life (although some shows like the Simpsons where nothing changes are fun in their own twisted way, despite Bart still being 10 yrs old even after the Simpson's 10th year anniversary!).

The OC is chockful of good characterization. People suffer losses, people fall in love, people move on, etc. etc. UNlike shows like Dawson's Creek where they just play 'Musical Sex Chairs' and their idea of a cliffhanger is having one character sleep with another one (ooohhh...that is like SO groundbreaking for a teen drama...please...)

Midway thru the season, all the kids suffer adversity and the group becomes tighter because of it. For example Luke's dad is revealed to be gay; while Marissa tried to kill herself after having drinking problems due to her parents breaking up; then Ryan steals Marissa from the insenstive jock Luke. Both popular kids get ostracized at school and finally the group bonds tighter as they realise at the end of the day, there is no line separating jocks from nerds.

*start RANT*
Shit! I just realise how frivolous and lightweight the plots to this show are as I was typing the examples above. Why the fark am I so devoted to this light entertainment when there are so much more important stuff I can do with my life, like go out and do some community work, etc. etc.? I don't know...maybe it's cos I'm just a weak, malas person or sumthin.....I feel SO guilty for liking this show so much!
*end RANT*

Besides the characterization, the scriptwriting is really, really tight. People talk like normal people do at normal people pace using normal people shortcuts / shorthand when ur talkin to people u are close with. U don't feel as though they're reading scripts...their presentation are just natural...maybe that's why it's so easy to get hooked on the show.

The last factor why I like the show so much is because it is blatantly written by a comic book geek.

Every episode or so, features the lead character Seth Cohen expounding on the virtues of coming book reading or showcasing his geek knowledge in comic book collecting. The fact that one of the storylines in the first season features Seth being chased after by two hot girls in a 'Betty & Veronica'esque fashion (a predicament I'm sure EVERY dateless comic book geek would willingly sacrifice their right 'ball' to be in that position!) just makes it even more entertaining to me.

Thruout the first season, Seth has changed from the unsure, geeky character that he is into a wise-cracking, comic-book-quoting, smart-ass who enjoys the affections of two beautiful girls chasing him. It's realistically done as well cos under Seth's shy, geeky, hermitlike exterior is a charming person who's a cool guy to hang out and crack jokes with.

This being a teen melodrama, the events of course get amped up more than normal and everything that can go wrong happens. Parents get divorced, jilted boyfriend have an affair with the girlfriend's mom, girlfriend falls for disturbed psycho masquerading as good guy, etc. etc.

I know no single person can go thru that much drama in one life but hey, among all the current crop of teen dramas, I'd say The OC is the most well written show with a cast of unbeliavably beautiful actors/tresses, plus a good balance of the unexpected and logic.

So there u have it....my guilty pleasure which I unfortunately, inexplicably, and puzzlingly have fallen in love with and devote my every fiber of being to following the series.

I'm really, really, sad to say this, but I can't wait to get a pirated copy of the First Season DVD Boxed Set of The OC ! Please write to me people if you find any copy of them in an 'upmarket' DVD pirate store courtesy of your friendly-neighbourhood DVD pirate.


;-p

Managing Long Hair.

I have newfound respect for women these days.
(Not that I didn't have any before today that is!)

Q: HOW do you women put up with LONG HAIR ?

I'm currently sporting shoulder length hair and for the love of good its drivin me insane !

If I don't shampoo it every 2 days, my hair starts getting greasy and my scalp turns itchy (I'll spare u the further gory details). Even if I shampoo everyday, when I go to the gym and run on the treadmill, my scalp still tingles (not in a Spider-sense kinda way but more in an annoying itchy buzz) and it gets really hot under my long hair.

Do u women wear a shower cap or sumthin when u take a bath ?

Is it preferable NOT to wash ur hair when u shower ?
(btw I wash mine every time I shower if ur thinking that I'm some mangy long haired hermit)

I really have a newfound respect for women who despite having long hair, still wear their tudung or headscarves. I mean Malaysia is freakin hot enough as it is....how do you women put up with keeping that mass of hair under ur headscarves ? Is there a cooling mechanism built in somewhere that I'm missing ?

Plus even if u don't wear head scarves, how come u can stand doing strenuous activity like running, hiking, etc with long hair ? Doesn't the itchy overheated feeling just override ur concentration and make u wanna just stop and scratch that itchiness away?

I don't know....come on women readers of the long-haired variety, answer my questions in the comments section for the benefit of us insensitive guys and open up a whole new world in man-woman relations !

Let us hear ur plight / success for us to understand u better!

;-p


Of course, I always have the option of cutting my hair short....hhhmmmm...that sounds like a plan !

(L2R: Nain, Nazrul & Me at the 1st Wedding) 

With the Happy Couple: Fadhil & Azza 

At the 2nd wedding with our host: Shahril (I look kinda 'stoned' in this pic!) 

At the 2nd Wedding with Afdlin Shauki 

Sunday Recap

Here's a recap of the festivities I had on Sunday, my 24th birthday. ;-p

Sunday was definitely a day for mistaken identities, deja vu, double wedding celebrations, a titanic tussle of two boyfriends (more on that JUICY one laters), and a convergence of my past and the present (which is like WAY cool now that I think about it).

So being an 'anti SO-sial' beeatch, I had originally decided to sleep in late on my birthday and like wake up midday then just waste away the day watching dvd boxed sets of WW2 (it's a good one as well being Steven Spielberg's / Tom Hank's Band of Brothers, but definitely NOT something u wanna do on ur birthday right ?)

Neways, Nazrul,a good mate of mine from Edinburgh (who's currently back for summer hols) decided that wasting away watching DVDs is no way to spend the special day. So he poked and prodded me into going to 2 wedding receptions.

One reception being our former Edinbra (that's how the Scots pronounce Edinburgh btw ppl) mate's and another being some political big wig's daughter's wedding. (One thing to note about Nazrul, he's a social climber and am really good with people of all ages and creed. So that makes him a good politician candidate, no ?)--Jgn mare Nazrul wei! ;-p

I felt really2 bad agreeing to go to 2 weddings since I had originally declined going to one already, which is my office mate's brother's wedding.

The first one went off without a hitch as the happy couple had a great wedding reception and I managed to meet up with more Edinbra mates. (it's always a good thing to meet up ppl from ur past and see how much they've changed, etc. etc. )

I was dreading the second one since I did not know the bride and groom, and my friend 'barely' knew this political big wig. But it was held at Seri Melayu, an authentic Malay cuisine establishment so what the hell...I could always go for the free food , non ?

Well, I guess someone up there must've been having a good chuckle as I entered the second wedding reception.

I did a double take as I saw the bride and groom and had a mini-Friendster moment.

Somehow, this wedding reception is the same reception I had originally declined to go to (the one held for my office mate's brother)! Hahahaa...what I'd do to have a picture of my face as a sense of deja vu and realization dawned upon my anti SO-sial brain.

So I kinda got double invitations to the same wedding, one from the groom's side and another from the bride's side. It was really cool to see my past (MY Edinbra mates) converge with my present (my office colleagues) in one auspicious ceremony.

After the double weddings, we hung out around KLCC and met up with more Edinbra mates. It was good to hang out with some ppl my age after being SO disconnected from life. I blame myself at the end of the day for not making more of an effort to go out and re-connect with past friends and stuff, u know....

Neways, one chickmate of mine brought along her current squeeze to the gathering. To make matters more interesting, midway, her old/current flame (I don't know, matters of the heart are like SO complicated I guess u gotta really ask her who THIS guy is to her nowadays) also joined us.

We sure did have a fun time seeing the titanic tussle between two testosterone-induced love-mad males..... one was abrupt and distant all night long while the other was easygoing and seemed to relish the challenge. I don't know who u'll end up choosing girl but if I were u, I'd go with the more easygoing guy....don't know how good he is in bed tho' so that might be a minus...hahahahahaha ;-p

Neways, I've rambled long enough, I had a really, really great time yesterday and would like to thank everyone that made it a superb birthday fer me. It's sure was one of the coolest I've had in quite some time. (*NiK's conscience* How SAD is that proclamation ? Jeez do I need to get out more or what?)

It made me realise that I might be missing a significant other in my life currently, but with friends this good (Edinbra mates/Office mates/etc.), I don't mind not being tied down with a lady for the mean time!

;-p

24 today......

24 years ago, on this very date, in small KL clinic, a couple was miraculously bestowed with a baby boy.

Unbeknownst to them, this was no regular baby; for he was the last descendant of a civilization from a mirror galaxy millions of miles away, which was on the brink of extinction.

Through the wonders of the alternate earth's pseudo-magi-science, they managed to transport only ONE person out of the planet onto our Earth.

This boy was a culmination of a millenia of culture and science, all packaged into one single being.
The last hope of Krypton, meant to be their best and the bravest. Hard-wired with enough nano-technology in his bloodstream to be able to leap tall buildings, stop bullets cold in its tracks and run faster than a KL Komuter....

Fast forward to 24 years later and the year is 2004.

Now the boy has all but grown up into a man.

By day, he is a mild-mannered corporate flunky; working in the sub-caverns of a non-descript money-making, profit capitalizing investment bank. But by night he is a creature of darkness; an avenger of justice; a beacon of hope for the victims of the denizens of the dark alleys of KL,

He is.....NiK!

Hahahahahaahha ...seriously tho, today's the day I add another year to my application forms and another year I get closer to the big 30 (well it is still a long time yet right ? I mean 6 years is like so.... then again, that's what I said when I was like 18)

SO I'm 24 today.

And looking back past this one year, I've grown and changed a lot.

I finally ended my studying days (which funnily enuff, I am ONLY starting to miss now, A LOT!)

Started my life as a working adult ( u know the whole rigmarole of waking up early to go to work, get stuck in a jam, face ur boss & colleagues, have lunch with office mates, etc.)

Finally start earning a living for myself (which is never enough and always ends by the 2nd week of the month), etc. etc.

So if I was someone else looking at myself, I'd say I'm doing great, (I don't mean to brag here) but I think I've got :

• a great job with good future prospects for growth (eventho it's not the field I wanted to do when I was in college),

• a great family who loves and supports me,

• gotten re-acquainted with some of my old friends and made new networks at work,

• drive a nice car (eventho it's a 20 year old Mercedes...hey it's a Merc baby!)....

so what am I missing ?

Well, truthfully, I'd say.... a girl to call my own....

*Start RANT*
I'm like SO politically incorrect, allright the correct term would be significant other or woman but hey, 'girl to call my own' just rolls of the tongue better than 'significant other to call my own' innit? And I'm sexist enough to call a woman a girl...so sue me..sheesh !
*End RANT*

So that'd be the first thing on my 'Things To Do' list for this 24th year then....get in a relationship with a girl who understands this weird alien from another mirror dimension who has an affinity for socially-inhibiting activies such as playing fantasy card games, watching foreign dvds, reading comic books, etc.

I mean how hard is it to find a woman who digs all that right ? ;-p

*NiK's conscience* I think u gotta lay off those socially-inhibiting activities first buddy before ur even date-worthy. I mean have u ever taken a look at urself recently ? Dude !

*NiK's brain* Note to self: Add finding a NEW conscience to 'Things to do' list....

;-p

P.S. Thank you to everyone who wished me Happy Birthday thru text, call, in person and even one owl mail (Cheers Harry P...I reall appreciate it...could've done without the Chocolate Frogs tho' I'm like WAYYYY scared of frogs!) :-)

Idle Hands are the Devils Friends! 

Perspective is EVERYTHING!

It's 2 a.m. on a Saturday night and I'm still online.

I can't say that I just got back from some club or summat cos I haven't. Neways, this post isn't gonna be about my lack of a social life on Saturday nights, I'm sure I'll cover that in therapy next time I see my shrink ! ;-p

Seriously tho' I just felt like talking about how TIME can change you, and ur outlook on the world.

Here's something I wrote about 6 months ago when I just started my working life and started facing the trials and tribulations of being an adult. It's been on my Friendster 'About Me' profile part for ages and I feel, now with greater perspective, it's time for a change; neways lets welcome Nik from 6 months ago, ppl:

I'm a 23 year old Corporate 'Flunky' who just entered the Rat Race in one of Malaysia's Premier Merchant Bank.

Still getting used to the fact that I'm no longer a teenager but an actual living-breathing-honest-to-goodness-working Adult.

Currently facing a 'mid-mid-life crisis' as I start questioning what I'm currently doing and whether I want to do it for the next 30 years of my life

I mean, I finished 11 years worth of schooling, then did 3 years of college, and another 3 years of Uni JUST to end up behind a desk in a nondescript cubicle, in a nondescript corporate building?

Is this ALL there is to LIFE then ?

To repeat the cycle my parents did and their parents before them did as well ?

Live, Work, Breed, Die.

Repeat Ad Nauseam.

Well...... I gotta say I've learned a lot about myself in the past 6 months working at The Firm.

And, meeting a young rookie who just started work last Friday kinda gave an epiphany of what I musta been like 6 months ago, fresh out Uni, full with grand desire to succeed, yadda, yadda, yadda.

Sometimes life just doesn't work out as much as u'd like it to. But it doesn't mean you gotta give up ur dreams cos what ur doing now isn't what u'd figure u'd be doing when u were slogging ur ass off in Uni.

I realise the quandry I'm currently in now and am making plans to survive it for the next 5 years. I'll put up with this bullshit job cos I realise eventho' it's not the art-based job that I want to do (i.e. advertising / film making, etc.) it can give me so many other experiences which I can use in the future i.e. learn how to hob-nob with rich, succesful ppl, learn how they've made their money, make contacts, heck even be one of them someday.

THEN, once I'm financially independent, I'll god-willing GET to do what I wanna do in life.

Not what my parents want me to, not what society deems to be a respectable job, etc.

So for now, I'm ready to learn The Game.

How do people make money on the stock market? What do you have to do? Who do you have to know to make it? etc.

I may have to sell my soul in the process, but it will be worth it once I make it and have enough to finally do what I wanna do, right ?

I don't know guys...I'll answer that question once I've crossed that bridge!

Test!

Testing 1, 2, 3!

Houston, I think we have a problem here.

Standing by for command from Ground Control.

;-p

Heyheyhey!

Heyheyhey!
Hey ppl,

It's another boring day at the office when the impulse hit me and led me to creating this blog.

Call it boredom, call it sadness, call it an attention-deficit disorder; whatever it is, I hope U (yes U reading this blog right now) would come back in the coming days, weeks, months and years (God-willing I get to live that long that is) would come back to check up on ME !

Well, I think that's it for my FIRST post...gtg back to work...I see the boss lurking about.... hahahaha